MSS HiFi is immediately interviewing qualified individuals for these positions:

1) Shipping department: packaging, pick-up, delivery. Must be very computer literate, owns a valid driver's license with clean history, able to lift up to 150 pounds.

2) Sales staff: Multiple positions available. Must be an audiophile - jaded audiophiles even better! Lame traditional retail store experience not required. We want Internet savvy, hardball wheel and dealer who learned their sales craft from the streets. These are very fun and rewarding positions. You will learn from the BEST.

3) Technician: need someone who is highly skilled in both circuitry and mechanical tasks. Must have experience in various ultra high-end home audio equipment.

4) Webmaster: responsible for daily maintenance of our websites, sales listings, public relations, graphic designs and many more creative tasks. Ability to take professional photographs of the products we sell is a plus. If you have counter-intelligence and documents experience, you're probably hired!

5) Operations manager: a bulldog who can get anything done at any cost, whether it be torturing all the spies that are sent to our store, securing crazy financing or bulk deals so that we can sell everything at a loss or no profit for a year just to screw with other dealers, videotaping Bill Leebens in compromising positions with a hooker, or getting the boss out of jail. In the world of MSS HiFi, nothing is too outrageous.

6) Interns: prepare invoices, greet customers etc. Hey, you might be doing this for free or at minimum wage, but we'll find you a rich boyfriend or girlfriend from our clientele.

7) Female models: pose in sexy pictures with our products. Some of the manufacturers don't like it, so we'll do more of it! Twirling Candy!!